Black Friday from a Dodge Durango

Because that’s where I’m writing this from. This is because I have an easier time accessing the online world from a car in a Home Depot parking lot in Erie, Pennsylvania, than I do from my parents’ home. Let us give thanks, indeed.

Every year I get up stupid early to engage in the Black Friday shopgasm with my Mom. I don’t know why. Neither of us is that good at it. You know what was the first thing she picked up this morning at Walmart? Cucumbers. Yeah, man, those things NEVER go on sale.

In the below picture, you can see the throngs who turned out at the Edinboro store. Notice how none of them are around us? That’s because we were picking up crescent rolls. Because, you know, BARGAINS.

I shouldn’t make fun of mom. I’m lousy at this too. I bought X-Files DVDs. They were $13.99! Sure, that’s what they cost last week, too, and at a time when normal people are awake, but screw that – I’m supporting the economy!

On the other hand, we also hit Borders (were there sales? Of course not, I just like going to Borders at 8 a.m.), where I saw this awesome set of signs:

“Graphic novels? Bah! Show me to the Other Graphic Novels, my good man!”

Also: Breakfast. Erie has some painfully slim pickin’s in this department, but a quick iPhone search (my god, i’ve become one of them) got us The Breakfast Place. If you’re in Erie, you really ought go.

Eggs, pancakes, and Greek fries, all before 10 a.m. Overall, a successful day.

2 thoughts on “Black Friday from a Dodge Durango

  1. That’s a pretty funny story Bob. My wife is really into Black Friday, and I’ve accompanied her in the past. She could teach you and your mother something because she always sticks to the plan. She laughed when I showed her your post and shook her head as if to say, “Rookies!”

    • We’ve been doing it this way for years. I don’t think either of us really wants to buy all that much, it’s just kind of something dumb we do. I’m not exaggerating, either – my mom read the post and insisted to me that it made sense to buy cucumbers RIGHT THEN.

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